future

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monika-jia-rui-242

Hurricane

April is stormy and passes by in a haze. My fear of being hurt and abandoned prevails. Lines and lines of squished words fill my notebook. The smaller and unreadable, the better. To avoid people reading it accidentally. I write during classes, boring speeches, lunch break, in the bus. The notebook is almost full. I wish the void within me could be filled as easily. The words don’t make a lot of sense, but I write as much as I can, hoping that a flash of genius would...

Second Thoughts

In the last few months, I’ve published a couple of personal posts, never being scared about how much I was revealing about myself. In theory, I knew I was making myself vulnerable, but I never actually felt vulnerable – till now. I’m going to start my studies next month. We’re a small class, containing just fifteen students. So far, my fellow students were anonymous, so I wasn’t too worried about them. But last week I received some emails from my university and...

purple flowers

2000

I can’t believe it – my blog has reached 2000 followers! When I started it sixteen months ago, I never imagined there’d be so many people interested in what I’m sharing. Thank you so much for your support, especially in form of comments! ♥ I’m still trying to figure out how I can return all the love you give me. One day I’ll come up with something creative! In the meantime, I’d like to think of you as people with names and stories and not...

In

Quietly I finish reading the paranormal romantic novel that has sucked me into its world during the last couple of days. It ends on a good note and leaves me with a tender feeling inside. I open my email program again. The dreaded email could arrive anytime and I want to be in a good mood when I open it so in the worst (and most probable) case, I’d be able to move on quickly. An email. From Lucerne. First, the email is...

dreamy self-portrait

Back On Track

Trying to keep it together and keep going can be quite exhausting. Not letting possible failure bring you down, convincing yourself that everything will be okay while the doubtful and pessimistic voice screams something else.. I know my rational part is right. But how do you convince emotions? After spending the last week encouraging myself, reading and doing some self-therapy by binge-watching all the Vampire Diaries episodes I’ve missed since last year (yes, I actually watch this teenie-drama-series. I firmly disagree with the...