The Light

On some days, I’ve laughed merrily, the black phase just a faint memory in the back of my mind. I’ve even started to wonder if I hadn’t been too dramatic. On the first spring day this year, I have a wonderful photo shoot with a very talented girl. My heart pumps passion through my veins. We create photos I love. It doesn’t happen often enough, but whenever it does, it fills me with a deep sense of accomplishment, making all the struggle and failure worth it. ✕ ✕ ✕ But...

A Gift For You

My loves, I want to thank you wholeheartedly for your loving words of support. To be honest, I didn’t expect that anyone would actually bother reading my last post when I published it. It’s a mess of desperation and confusion, written for myself while trying to make sense of what was happening in my head. It’s honest and ugly – I figured it wouldn’t be appealing to read. And yet so many of you didn’t only read it, but also...

Demons

Life has been going on quietly. Days went by without my usual emotional rollercoaster. No state of joy nor of anxiety, just mediocrity. I was tired and busy – but I believed I was fine. Life is bland and less intense this way – without emotions, there’s no impulse to create or write. But it’s better than feeling down, right? ✕ ✕ ✕ I was wrong. I’ve been walking on ice all along while believing I was on a boring but safe path. The ground...

Saved

This week has been really rough. I helplessly felt darkness consuming me from within; insecurities, sorrow and hopelessness persistently gnawed at me. All I wanted to do was to sleep till this mess was over, avoiding stressful social interactions. Luckily I didn’t chicken out of meeting my old friend Mia. After talking for a while to catch up on our lives, we moved on to taking some random shots, experimenting with material that was lying around. I wanted to keep it...

Gone

What words can describe the feeling that settles in when you realise that once again you’re separated, being the one left behind? A part of me is missing. I walk the streets alone and can’t look into these brown eyes full of love, feel his warmth by my side, my hand in his, our fingers entwined. I know I’ll be fine eventually, both of us always are. But right now I feel like something has been torn away from me. I miss him dearly....