I didn’t think of writing about my long-distance relationship when I started this blog three weeks ago. Then I realized that there are some blogs dedicated to this topic and it felt good knowing there were other people in the same situation as me who were being positive as well. So after asking my boyfriend if he’s okay with it I decided to write about our LDR, hoping that I can connect with my LDR-fellows. :)
We got to know each other during my exchange year in Uruguay 2011/12, almost four years ago. Unlike the majority of the exchange-year-relationships, we didn’t get together back then but only last April, almost two years after the end of my exchange year and my return to Switzerland. Our story is quite complicated and has many bang-your-head-against-a-wall-moments – I’ll share it here soon.
We live around 10,000km apart – I don’t know the exact distance and to be honest, I don’t want to know because it doesn’t matter – and see each other twice a year. The next time in less than four weeks when I’m going to stay in Uruguay for two months.
A long-distance relationships requires a lot of commitment, money, time and effort. I’m a traveler and explorer, but since my boyfriend lives in Uruguay, I “have to” return to the same place over and over again. What makes it worth it?
I haven’t seen him for almost four months so my point of view is different from when I’m with him but for now, I can say that he gives me a lot of reassurance and strength. It’s not about crazy butterflies and seeing everything pink. It’s feeling that I have someone who supports me no matter what choices I make, who accepts and loves me with my flaws and insecurities and having someone with whom I can talk about every crazy thing I have in my mind.
We don’t know in which country we’ll end up in a couple of years but that’s okay. I’m too much of a roamer to have a normal relationship so this is a reason why a LDR is quite practical for me. Then, a LDR shows that it’s not only about the present but also about the future. We wouldn’t be together if we didn’t see a shared future. I don’t care if I sound ridiculous, I can imagine us being married and having kids together one day. Yes, we’ve had our discussions, but have never had a real fight (and it’s so not true that it’s more likely to fight when you’re in a normal relationship). I know it’ll come one day but I think it’s a good sign that it hasn’t happened so far.
Besides, he’s always present. Of course not physically but in my mind, no matter what I do. Maybe it sounds a little bit psycho but this is how I feel and what makes the distance bearable. As long as I don’t spend time with couples who are all over each other (something I’m trying to avoid), I’m okay. No, not just okay, I’m good, knowing that there’s someone who cares for me as much as I care for him. Distance doesn’t matter then.