mirror (day iv)

2017-08-01

Caro

I wish someone would invent an alternative mirror that doesn’t reflect our outermost layer but rather who we are in the inside. We’re so fixed on how we look that what lies underneath our skin has become secondary. We’re taught that hardly anything matters as much as our appearance. So in our insecurity, we turn towards this polished metal and let it define who we are, how much we’re worth.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?

We spend so much money on products that are supposed to fix how we look, striving for perfection. We spend hours trying to straighten out our flaws and accentuate our best features. We waste our precious time worrying about how we can look more beautiful instead of focusing on becoming a better person. More loving, passionate, honest.

But when I think about it again, I realise that this alternative mirror showing us who we are in the inside already exists. We have to stop searching for our value in specular surfaces. They’ll never reveal anything of note. Instead, we should look at the people we hold close to us. The friends we surround ourselves with. Who they are says so much more about us than the reflection in the mirror ever will. They are the true mirrors, the only ones we really need.


Model: Caro

19 Comments
    1. I love reading your posts, when I read them I’m transported to another place where I actually stop to think. So good!

    1. I do believe that the inner and outer selves are connected, in that when we take care of the inner, it reflects in our outer appearance. And conversely, when we take a little time to care for the outer, and make ourselves like the way we look a little better, it affects our inner selves with more joy, peace, and confidence.

      1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Gloria! I love your point of view and agree with it to a certain extent – like that our personality shines through our radiation/vibrancy [I hope that’s the right word], or that we feel better inside when we take care of our body. There’s definitely a connection. But there are some things we just can’t change about our looks, things that are not related to who we are in the inside, and instead of accepting it we let it define us. It’s hard to put it into words.

    1. You are so right; our friends, and our loved ones, are a reflection of who we are. That is why it is so important that we let ourselves be vulnerable enough to show our true selves to them, to trust that we can, that there is nothing about us that we need hide. We are all imperfect, and when those that we’re close to reflect back to us that that is okay, we are set free to JUST BE. You write from what I think of as a kind of nakedness, and it is beautiful. I’m glad you saw my blog post–“Cultivating a mindful presence: the artist’s task,” and the Mary Oliver essay it included–because your doing so gave me the chance to discover your heartfelt blog and really beautiful photographs.

      1. I fully agree with you, Martta! That’s why I try to be my real me. It’s scary because when people reject me they’ll reject me for who I am, but on the other hand if people decide they want to be part of my life I’ll know that we’re truly connecting. Thank you for your lovely and thoughtful words. I really appreciate the compliments, too! Take care and have a wonderful weekend :)

Let me know what you think!

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